Archive for April, 2004

Relating to the Illusion - Further explanation

Published by Jonathan 4 years, 3 months ago in Defining the Dream. 0 Comments

This article is intended to provide further clarification and exploration of that which is explored in “The Illusion - A brief outline”

Today it came to my attention that it may be necessary to elaborate on a few points pertaining to what I have outline in ‘The Illusion - A brief outline’ which were perhaps not covered fully enough—or at all—in that article.

By referring to creation as I know it as ‘an illusion’ I am not denying it’s existence and hence taking this awareness on board should not result in an attempt within to deny the existence of life—in fact quite the opposite should result from understanding the nature of the illusion. By referring to the world and creation as I we know it as an illusion I am simply denying it’s existence in the way we perceive it to be. Put another way I am stating that reality does not exist in the way that we—the collective and singular human ego-mind—have believed.

To give an example at a fairly tangible and relatively understandable level—for the collective ego-mind it is not possible to be in a body in two places at one time yet for those who have mastered various spiritual disciplines this is entirely possible and does in fact take place. Likewise with the world perceived by the human ego-mind it is not possible to teletransport ones body from one location to another yet from the ego-mind of a Shaman (for instance) it is entirely possible and does in fact take place. So here we have an example of ‘reality’ appearing to be one way for one group of people (most of the people alive today) with certain laws defining what is and isn’t possible, yet for another (small) group of people there are entirely different ‘laws’ that make all sorts of things possible that the bulk of the human collective would consider pure fantasy.

Now this is to me actually an example of the illusion taking on very different forms depending on the ego-mind through which it is projected. It does not illustrate the overall nature of the illusion—only that we can all have very different and even contradictory experiences of so-called ‘reality’.

What you see around you does exist and it doesn’t. Now I know your mind is going to hate reading that but it is simply how it is. It does not exist in the way we perceive it to, yet it does have an existence in the Mind of God. God created the I AM (or the “Son”—as used in Judaic-Christian terminology) in the likeness of Itself and as an extension of Itself. The I AM therefore had the power to Create like God yet could never create anything that makes God’s Creation obsolete of contradicts God. God created Light. That Light is what is beamed out through this metaphorical ‘film projector’ I have previously referred to. That Light does ‘exist’ and is ‘real’. Yet as the Light passes through the film of the ego-mind it is qualified in such a way that images appear on the wall (on the screen we experience as the human mind). The images themselves are not real. They do not exist.

If you are seeing an image of a cat on the wall and you remove the film strip then there is no longer a cat. Yet there is still Light—now in it’s pure form—projecting out and we can be aware of that Light. It is this Light that is real whereas the image we make it take on is not ‘real’. The image of Love is as close as we get to creating a real image through the ego-mind but it is still nothing relative to the Love of God that exists within us and is available to us through a direct experience of God. Of course I am attempting to put into words that which is beyond words and it’s all ‘horses for courses’ at the end of the day. I read over this and feel that none of this really gets to the point. I can only apologise for my clumsiness at explaining these things.

So what I would like to emphasise is that we are not here to deny what we see around us. Rather I wish to suggest that there may be a distinct benefit in ‘denying’ they way in which we are seeing reality and interpreting it. Denial ultimately has no purpose yet denial of the ‘right’ kind can assist you in unraveling your apparent entanglement in the illusion—or in the false interpretation of what you are experiencing. I am not referring to a ‘rigid’ kind of denial that is possible for the mind to get into about things it doesn’t want to deal with. Rather I am talking about a ’soft’, ‘kind’, and ‘open’ sort of denial. Let’s say you are looking at a dog and your friend says, “Hey, look at this lovely little kitty cat” (and he really sticks to the notion that its a cat) —at some level you will gently deny that this is a cat, whilst still being loving toward what your friend is choosing to perceive. This is a very different experience from the sort of denial that might rigidly say, “I am perfect. I don’t have any harsh feelings of judgement, and I am only capable of love and goodness”. To this I would say that in fact your power to love and create is equal to, and in fact relies upon, your innate power to hate and destroy.

I hope this makes sense. I will say I found it rather tricky trying to put this into words because my own mind actually has no idea what I am referring to or talking about. It only has memories of it that come about through an experiential awareness of what I am referring to. It is the experiential part that is real. The explanation of it is unreal yet might perhaps allow you to release your tight grip on reality enough to allow some of what I have talked about into your experience also.

I would like to say that this world you experience is Sacred Ground. The body-mind-emotions you experience are Sacred Ground and Sacred Space. For they are all imbibed by the Light of God through Your I AM Presence which is an extension of God. Therefore I invite you to treat this illusion with the same degree of respect and gratitude you would bring to a that which is Sacred. And because that which is Sacred always has an element of the Unknown running through it then please also bring to your experience of this illusion a degree of awe, wonderment, and innocence that a child would bring to any of the great mysteries of life. This wonderment will help prevent you from experiencing rigidity and limitation in your Awareness. The Gratitude and respect will allow you open further to God’s Vision of You and this world.

All that you choose to experience, both in the form of ‘light’ and ‘dark’ has a purpose. It’s just not the purpose most people ascribe to it. The One purpose of everything in your experience (judged by you as ‘good’, ‘bad’ or otherwise) is to return you back to yourself; your true nature; your liberation from false perception. Reject nothing. Love everything. Judge not. Love what is. Allow. Release.

With love,

Jonathan

The Unacceptable Truth

Published by Jonathan 4 years, 3 months ago in General. 0 Comments

The true nature of this world—actually all of creation and the universe as we know it—is something that the human ego-mind has a great deal of trouble accepting and is deeply afraid of. So great is this fear that it has deeply embedded itself in a profound self-projected illusion set up in nearly every regard to protect itself from the Truth. The ego-mind is doing all it can to keep you from God and from ever really knowing and experiencing that that which I AM never separated from God and this this world—as we know it—never actually existed.

Now just what do we make of that?

“Never actually existed” means exactly that. Although the ego-mind will struggle until the end of time to fathom just what this means and where this leaves you in the grade scheme of things.

God is. This world is not “of God”. Rather it is “of the ego-mind” in it’s attempt to maintain the false notion that it is somehow separate from God.

What I am starting to see is that in this world—which was created by the ego-mind—we go to great length to justify our position in the universe and we also go to great length to aggrandise what is essentially our own self-projected illusion. We talk about “self-fulfilling prophecies”—when actually the whole of life is a self-projected—and therefore—self-fulfilling mythology of the ego-mind.

It is our deep attachment to the illusion of separation that ensures we always avoid the unacceptable Truth that there is only One and hence you and I do not exist in the way that we have come to imagine. And it is all of the imagination.

What I am starting to see is that within this world we go to great length to “improve” our situation. Whether we try to improve it materially or spiritually, there is a constant striving and hoping that we might improve things. I have seen many people step into much of what the “New Age movement” seems to have to offer because deep down they would like to improve their life and the situation they find themselves in. I have also seen many step deeper and deeper into materialism in order to improve their “lot” through the procuring of money, wealth and physical objects. Both these paths will lead to the same experience—namely the ongoing experience of separation. This experience is a lie that we create for ourselves because the perceived pain and guilt we imagine we will experience if we let the lie go brings about too much apparent anguish for the ego-mind to handle.

Yet, that’s the idea. The ego-mind is not meant to “handle it”.

God is meant to “handle it”, and God know’s—as does That which I AM—that there is really nothing to handle at all.

What more can I say? I ‘feal’ I have said enough—I shall leave the rest to you.

May the Truth set you free.

Life as a reflection of Self

Published by Jonathan 4 years, 3 months ago in General. 0 Comments

22nd October 2003 (Original time article was written and posted on FEAL)

There is a knowing held by the Kahuna Shaman Priest (and many other spiritual “systems”) that “We are Divine beings, and as Divine Beings we need NOTHING but a mirror” and life, in it’s many diverse manifestations, presents us with that mirror.

So far, this is also my experience of life. All I see around me is simply Me. All I experience is an experience of My-Self. All I perceive in the world around me and in the people and events around me is a reflection of myself. There are certainly many moments in time (often rather longs ones!!) when I “forget” this Truth, or I times when I simply know it intellectually but it remains to be lived at an experiential level. These are, of course, the areas within me when Illumination and Realisation are still required.

In my experience, there is a trap in this perspective that I have seen arise in people who start to intellectually apply it to their life without having actually deeply realised what it truly means. You see, this perspective come from a place that is beyond the Illusion or Maya of life on Earth. It comes from that place which “knows of no separation”, beyond the human condition.

What I have witnessed is that some people take this thought-form and start apply it willy-nilly to everything around them but in an incomplete way. For instance, if a large number of people happen to have and express a negative opinion about me then I am told by those with the above mentioned perspective that this person is mirroring a message to me about my nature… that I am to look into what they are telling me and realise that this negative thing is part of my make-up and is showing me something I am to work on within myself.

What I have come to see, however, is that this attitude is actually coming from both perspectives working (or not working as the case may be) together… The view that everything is a mirror of me and all is one, combined with the (usually unconscious) view that there is in fact separation.

You see… What I have come to understand is that when I look into a mirror there is an image on that mirror… and image of my body, face and overall form. Now, I can see that body and take that image at face value. I may see that image of myself and think negative thoughts. I may react by thinking “boy what a good looking guy”, or I might react with the thought “Gezz, what an ugly guy”. Which is true? Which represents what I see in front of me?

Now, even the mirror itself might not be true… perhaps it is distorted… cracked even. Do I look at myself in such a mirror and react by thinking “gosh, I am cracking up and all distorted”? Also, what about my energy field, my Aura? I do not see that in the mirror unless I already have the ability to see such things. If I took my image in the mirror at face value I could walk away believing that “I have no Aura and the concept of an Aura is not true”. But I already know that we do all in fact have an Aura, so I don’t walk away with this reaction.

If I elevate my perspective to a place of Truth I will see a radiant divine being of light… no matter what the image in the mirror looks like at the apparent level. The trick is being able to elevate ones perspective. I have found that the degree to which I am identified with myself at a material level is the degree to which my perspective remains stuck or bound to this level. The degree to which I identify with God and My TRUE SELF is the degree to which I can view the world with an elevated persepective seeing the divine in all things.

What I have come to realise is this:
If a person holds a “negative” opinion of me, or even 100 people hold that same opinion, this is not what Creation is reflecting to me. No, this is just a distorted image created by a distorted mirror. The point of reflection actually takes place WITHIN me… it is in how what I see effects me - the reaction I have to it within myself. What is invoked within me by the images and reflections I see in the world… that is what counts.

Let me take a few examples that might make my point clearer…
Jesus Christ was no doubt a very enlightened and highly conscious Being. He quite obviously did not live in a place of separation within himself. Ultimately by the time he was in his thirties I think we can say that He typically felt truly and deeply at one with God, Creation and all things. Yet, at a material/human level he had many enemies… that is, many people that hated and despised him. So much so that these people eventually crucified him. Many thought he was the devil, the anti-christ, a user of witchcraft and many other things. With the misconstrued “world as mirror” view on life do we now say that these people were showing Jesus something about his dark side that he was not facing and dealing with and that he should have stopped in his tracks and bought into this opinions with his energy?

I think not.

Rather I would say that these people were in a state of unconsciousness themselves… They were living in the Maya and identifying with the Maya (”illusion”). When they looked at Jesus they saw their own darkness and fears. When he looked at them, and all their opinions of him, he saw nothing but Himself… namely a divine loving being. Of course, we all contain the whole, so that which is in other humans is also within myself. People may see darkness in someone like Jesus (or Buddha, or Osho, or You, or Me) and that darkness is in fact there… because all manifestations of the human condition are within each person. But we only IDENTIFY with a few of those possible manifestations at any moment in time.

If you fully and completely identify with that manifestation of the human condition which is Divinity, Truth, Love, Enlightenment then that is what you are… no matter what those around you might see in you and express to you as their opinions. Of course, most of us identify with things that are not in our Divinity. This is where we have forgotten our divinity. A simple way to discover these misidentifications is to be AWARE of what and how I REACT to in the world and in those around me. This is where the “mirror” or life is a reflection of my self analogy comes into play. The MIRROR dynamic is not in what other people’s reactions are to me - rather it is in what my reaction to them consists of.

A healer friend I know once told me “It is none of my business what other people think of me”. I would say I have to agree. I would add that what is my business is that which is going on within me in reaction to the world around me. Namely, how am I managing my ENERGY / LIFE-FORCE moment to moment, particularly in my relation-ships with those people and events happening around me and APPARENTLY to me?

I can see that the above has come out not as I would like it. I will endeavour to return to this page and rewrite this once I find a way to put this more clearly into words.

Blessings,

Jonathan Evatt

Jonathan’s Dream…

Published by Jonathan 4 years, 3 months ago in Defining the Dream. 0 Comments

I want to make it quite clear that Jonathan is in his own dream. So long as he is appearing in your world and is experiencing the world then he is in a Dream of one sort of another.

We are but dreamers of a dream. Were I to dream one night that I am a butterfly — upon awakening in the morning I would be lying there in my bed. Who’s to say whether I am in fact now a butterfly dreaming that I am a human lying there in bed, or whether I am a human that’s just woken up from dreaming I was a butterfly?

I don’t want you to take anything I say as Truth. I encourage you NOT to believe anything you read on this site. The Kahuna have a saying with I feel is quite true—”Belief is only necessary for that which is not real”.

Truth is experienced ONLY at the level of re-cognition. It does not happen through beliefs. In fact beliefs are ONLY REQUIRED FOR THAT WHICH IS NOT REAL. We can of course construct beliefs around what we recognise yet I suspect that through doing that we end up one (or more) steps removed from the Truth. That is what happens in most religions in this world. Someone re-cognises the Truth. Then they or other people (more likely the case) set up believes around that re-cognition of Truth. From there people join the religion because it unconsciously reminds them of what they too recognise as Truth but now through their association with the religion they, like all the other followers of religious beliefs, become one of more steps removed from the Truth they were seeking. The religion becomes a substitute for the Truth. Substitutes will NOT set you free.

Back to the topic at hand…

I feel moved to share what I comes into my awareness and the things that I know. I am aware that nothing I say, express and share is unique. It has all been said before. There is nothing that can be revealed to me that has not been revealed to those before me and those after me. There is nothing that I recognise and express which you are not also able to recognise and express. If fact—without wishing to twist your mind in on itself—I can say that in your world I am simply You recognising and expressing that which I AM aware of.

Know also that there are many different ways to express the things I am feeling moved to share. I have seem them expressed in ways far more poetic and elegant that I even seem to manage achieve. Yet as I am not trying to achieve anything in particular I feel complete okay with that and I trust that what I am feeling move to Be and the way I am being That is all part of the Perfection in my world and in yours.

What I know is the Truth for Jonathan in THAT moment.

It may not be the Truth for you.

Stay with what you recognise—at a level of FEELING; not in the mind—and this web site will have served its purpose. You may leave taking nothing with you and that is quite okay.

The Dream I experience may be quite different from the Dream you experience. I get the impression that the Dream I am creating seems to have some script written into it that says “Hey, look, there is the nature of the Dream and over there is the doorway out”. I am gently moving my way toward that doorway.

By sharing my Dream with you perhaps that little script of possible escape will end up being transcribed into your Dream? Or perhaps that script is also written into your dream yet it might have become obscured? Perhaps my sharing that part of my Dream will help bring that same part of your Dream to the forefront of your Awareness through the re-cognition that takes place within you as you read these words?

If not, then so be it. If so, then glory glory hallelujah.

Jonathan

The Extent of the Illusion - Just how deep is the Rabbit Hole ?

Published by Jonathan 4 years, 3 months ago in Defining the Dream. 0 Comments

In this past week various realisations have made their way into my awareness. I anticipate that there are many Wisdom Seekers out there that might find some of these things a little hard to fathom. Yet I also know that if certain Truths are being revealed the Dream within my experience then there must be others that are also seeing these things and there must be others that are ready to learn about them. If that’s not the case then you might just like to jump back to the Article Index.

Okay, that’s enough fluffing around trying to explain myself !! Of course it’s only the ego-mind playing it’s games but at times I feel to give it some say in the matters at hand.

Seeing the depths
What I am seeing is just how deep and how extensive the Illusion is.
What I am seeing is that most of what I can see in the world today in terms of the various ‘ways out of the illusion’ are in fact more of the illusion. They are not ‘ways out’ at all. They simply take people into another aspect of the Dream. Total awaking does not actually take place at all when these ‘ways out’ are followed.

I can hear my mind thinking, ” These ‘paths’ may, however, help facilitate a certain ‘loosening up’ of the Dream”, and maybe this is so. Yet part of what I am seeing is about ‘control’. Just as there are many Programs of control at a worldly level I am now seeing—in a way that is much clearer and more extensive than ever before—that there are also Programs of control in the metaphysical and esoteric realms.

Faces of the ‘Spiritual’ Illusions
What I am referring to is all the spiritual paths, the practices, the Lamas, the Rinpoches, the Monks, the religions, the Sai Baba’s, the New Age beliefs, the Churches, the spiritual societies and so on and so forth—the list is rather huge . For a Wisdom Seeker these ‘things’ are commonly approached as ways out of the Dream. They are approached as ways to liberate oneself. They are approached as a source of Moksha and Enlightenment. They are approached as ‘the way out’ of the Illusion.

What I am seeing and what I wish to share with you is that—as far as I can presently tell with the Knowing I have—99% of them simply represent another layer of the Illusion. The Wisdom Seeker who ’succeeds’ on these paths may simply go from one more obvious layer of the Illusion into another more subtle and less obvious layer of the Illusion.

The Implications?
So what are the implications of what I am saying? None actually. For It all is as It is. It is—as always—about where we each decide to give our attention.

Only the Truth shall set you free and the Truth can ONLY be found within yourself for in Your world you are all that exists. There is no ‘other’.

Most of the ‘icons’ the world of Wisdom Seekers hold so dear and perceives as being ’spiritual’ and ‘paths out of the illusion’ are a crock of shit. Really. It’s as simple as that. They are not ‘bad’ or ‘wrong’, nor are the ‘negative’. These ‘False Profits’—perhaps that’s what I will call them—are what they are and in my world I have created them in order to facilitate remembering something important about Truth.

You are all there Is, as God
If you are really really serious about setting yourself free then I must tell you that YOU are the Path, YOU are the way out, and YOU are your source of Enlightenment. Of course God is there to help as you go through with Changing the Dream and Stepping Out of the Illusion but that goes without saying because YOU and GOD are one and the same. That which I AM is GOD. That I AM exists only there within YOU in your Dream. If you see it existing within ‘the other’ people out there know that you are only seeing the reflection of the I AM within YOU. The Dream is made of Light and That Light is God, yet the images we ‘make’ with that light is not God. Not to suggest that there is something other than God in existence. No, rather, I am suggesting that the images we perceive don’t exist. The Light running through the projector exists but the image we create with that Light is a figment of the ego-minds’ delusion.

My Experience
Over the years I have come across various so called teachers, Gurus, Masters, enlightened people, Yogi’s, teachings etc. Within each of them I have experienced something very beautiful and something that I recognise as Truth. Yet I have also found that I experience this ‘knowing’ that they are not free and the ‘picture’ they are presenting to the world (and to themselves, of course) is not the ‘whole picture’. I have felt moved to take on certain ‘things’ from ‘their path’ yet there was much I would leave and I would never feel ‘moved’ from within to ‘follow them’ or subscribe to ‘their path’. The one instance we I did subscribe to one of these paths more than usual I found that this place of ‘knowing’ deep within my experience of myself would keep reminding me that ’something isn’t right’—Jonathan, be-aware and see what you need to see. It took something like 7 years for me to see what I needed to see and then I walked away with love and gratitude for having had the experience that these two Yogi’s facilitated in my world.

The denial routine
The extent to which the ego-mind has had a grip on my experience of life and sense of Self is the extent to which I have not known just what to make of this ‘knowing’ that most of the ’spiritual paths’ are as much about control as everything else. I have for many years played it down and not given it a great deal of attention. What I am being shown now is that there is a very sound reason for why I have never felt moved to subscribe to the ways of the many Gurus, teachers and paths out there in the world. At times I felt ‘guilt’ and judgment around this. The ego-mind would get into this line of thinking that revolved around the idea that I must somehow be ‘avoiding’ the Truth and Enlightenment that these paths and teachers etc represent. I entertained the idea that ‘I am simply not surrendering enough and this resistance I am feeling toward such and such is my ego’s resistance to waking up’. It took me many years to get over that and let that lie go.

Quite to the contrary—my ego-mind loved the idea of being able to ‘join with others’ who were somehow more enlightened than me, and to be part of the ‘club’ and know that ‘I belong to something spiritual now’.

User beware
All I really wish to say is, “User beware” (be-aware).

If you are actively following a Guru or spiritual path I invite you to be-aware. Accept that you know nothing and that everything your perceive is not how it really is, and then take another look at this so called path or Guru.

I will also say that in my experience NO ONE THAT HAS BROKEN FREE OF THE DREAM will seek to create FORM around their WISDOM within the Dream. What I mean by this is that when I am free of the Dream I am formless. That formlessness will then pervade everything I do and create within the Dream. So if you come across teachers and Gurus and spiritual paths (etc) that have a lot of FORM around them then again, USER BE-AWARE. By ‘form’ I don’t simply mean form in terms of books, web sites, companies, organisations etc. These are forms that are an innate part of the Dream. Just this article you are reading is FORM.

What I am referring to they will not create FORM around their wisdom and who and what they are. To some extent they may have to create form around how that wisdom is imparted within this world of form—that, I think, would be unavoidable—but the Wisdom itself and their role in imparting It will remain Formless. And I mean Formless on all levels.

All this stuff that goes around about inner councils, Galactic Federations, the Inner Plane Mandalas of the Tibetan Tantric Buddhists, the Ascended Masters and the White Brotherhood, the spiritual hierarchies of the Inner Planes, etc etc, is a projection from within the Human ego-mind. It is a projection from within the Dream and is another means of control. It brings the lesson of being ‘completely out of control’ and just what that means. Ponder that for a while.

The Formless Teachers
The formless teacher wants no followers. She will always return the student to himself.
The formless teachers do not seek recognition.
The formless teachers will not make claims about who or what they are without also making that exact same claim for the student.
The formless teachers will not polarise themselves with the Illusion.
The formless teachers will not present themselves as ’something special’ above and beyond anyone and anything else in this world of Form. The formless teachers will love and share that love.
The formless teachers will not set themselves apart from the Illusion, humanity and everything else within the Illusion. They will not set them selves up as ’something conclusive’ and exclusive. They will relate to you as them self. They will treat you as them self. They will relate to you as God.
The formless teachers will NOT be on some kind of ‘mission to save the world’ or to ‘alleviate the suffering of the world’—because these teachers will see right through that illusion.
The formless teachers will not do fancy psychic tricks to gain your attention and they will not make attempts to appeal to your ego-mind.
The formless teachers will love so deeply and profoundly that you will quite likely fall in love with them, yet they will ALWAYS return you to loving the I AM within you for that is all there is to Love in your Dream.
The formless teachers will not playing out some trip to do with reincarnating to ‘compassionately solve the worlds problems’.
The formless teachers will not go out there (where?) and do battle with the Dark forces—for they will see right through that illusion.
The formless teacher is like the wind. It breezes by, imparts its silent message and moves on.

I don’t wish to name names*. I don’t wish to make anything wrong for IT IS ALL PERFECT. I don’t wish to say that any particular path or person is leading people astray. No one can be lead astray. There are no victims. We are all collectively creating this Dream and hence in your world your create the roles that these teachers of FORM play out. They are there to teach us about our formless Wisdom. Timeless Wisdom. Non-exclusive Wisdom.

All I wish to relay at this time is the simply message—’User beware / be-aware”. There is nothing ‘out there in the world’ that will give you your salvation. It is all deep within your formless Self—that which I AM deep within your so called Heart.

It’s deep within the Heart
Stay with that which is only felt deep within your heart. Oh yes, I know how troublesome that can be. I know how difficult that can be. I know how strong that urge to reach ‘out there’ for answers and salvation can be. Oh yes I know all too well. You and I are not unique in how we experience the pull of the Illusion that I AM somehow less than Perfect. We all go through it. I still watch it playing out within my Dream, just as I am sure you watch it playing out within your Dream. Less and less does it amount to me denying the Truth within my Heart and therefore I know that less and less will it result in your denying the Truth within your Heart.

I love you and wish you well as you too discover just how deep the illusion runs—and the Truth that HAS set you free.

Jonathan

*Okay, I have in fact named one name in this article. I won’t edit this out. It’s okay. Again, the role he is playing is perfect and it is providing an invaluable lesson to those that follow him and believe in his as the source of their salvation. Again, I simply say “be-aware” and let go of that which you are ready to release. Be willing to see that ‘it is not how it appears’. Be willing to turn to the Light of God within your own Being for that is the only access point you have to that Light. It does not exist out there in your Dream within the figments of your imagination (these Guru’s and teachers etc). In your Dream it does NOT exist within me either. Everything you experience ‘out there’ in your world is a projection. It is all playing out within your Mind. So turn within to God not ‘outward’ to God in some path or teaching.